Missing you [Ian]

[Nova Lee Artuvan]

Nova had been not feeling so hot lately, after trying to explain to Ian that she had feelings for him their honeymoon stage only lasted a few months. After awhile they became more and more distant, Nova was never convinced that She was the only girl he looked at with those hungry eyes, which caused a lot of issues between them. But Nova refused to let it consume her, so she went out and got a new dancing job at the new bar that had just opened up, Speak Easy.

She had always loved the feeling of having all eyes on her, and if Ian's eyes weren't on her she would keep doing what she did. She thought that it was easy to just give up and forget about him, or move on. But it really wasn't easy at all, she had known the kid since she was sixteen years old after all, and when two people have as much history as they did it was hard to just cut them out of her life. And it didn't help that everything reminded her of him.

So even though she was feeling as blue as her hair, she showed up to work today, it was her first day at this particular bar, and she had to admit she was a little nervous. She hoped that she would impress her boss, she had heard he was a real hard ass. She even had to do a few things she really wasn't proud of to get this job, but she was having trouble finding a job, and DJing was just not cutting it, she needed to pay the bills after all. Her and Tara did their best to survive and make sure all their needs were met. Her sister was her life and she never wanted her to be afraid about being broke, and she really didn't want to go to their dead beat dad for money.

She walked out of her dressing room, there were still two acts on before her and she decided she'd go out to the bar and have herself a red bull like she usually did before a show. She strutted to the bar while bobbing her head to the loud techno music that was playing while they waited for the show to start. She really enjoyed the set up of this place, it was really discrete and what not. She then planted herself on a bar stool and ordered a red bull, but when she looked around she couldn't believe her eyes. She noticed Ian at the other side of the bar, looking a little out of it.

"What's he doing here?" She muttered to herself. She almost wanted to cry, it was easy to hold in those emotions when he wasn't around but now when he was sitting there right in front of her in the flesh, she didn't know what to do. Weather to go yell at him, or to just go up and hug him and tell him to come back to her. Once she got her beverage she decided to go approach him, but as she got closer she realized his clothes looked a bit more baggy than usual and he looked really pale, not healthy. This really worried her. She finally got the courage to tap him on the shoulder. "Ian?" She called out to him, hoping he would hear her over the loud music.

Outfit: www.polyvore.com/nova-ian/set?id=97188839

[Ian Nathaniel Williams]

Ian wasn't himself; he had been down in the dumps for some time now. When the problems with Nova started, he couldn't help but start hating himself. He couldn't blame her, he would of deemed it as inappropriate of himself to do. Ian only had eyes for her, but his words didn't show that. When he got around a girl, the words just flowed out and he couldn't stop what came out; he was just that good with women. Good with women, horrible with emotions, and coping with drugs was a perfect description for Ian.

Emotions weren't his strong point and were more than likely never going to be. Whenever he did get really emotional over anything, he always looked for an escape. Any escape was good enough for him. First he started with weed, which he had been smoking since he was about 14. It didn't provide much of an escape because he could still think straight. Af first, Ian hadn't of been able to get his hands on anything heavier until he turned to his roommate Kyler. he had been down too, and unfortunately, the two always turned to drugs when things got rough. This was when Ian got into an old hadbit of his that almost killed him last time.

He then became addicted to cocaine once again. Now that he had his escape, he had completely forgoteen about his problems. He had even forgotten about some important things like eating and sleeping properly. Because of this, Ian had started losing weight like no one would believe because he barely had any weight to him in the first place. Now all of his clothers seemed extremely baggy and barely fit his shrinking frame. When he was sober enought to function some, which was when we did eat, he did notice these things. But, Ian didn't have the self control to himself, nore the mental capability because he still wanted to escape. All he wanted to do was live life without the worries. And that's what he was going to do; he was going out tonight.

After eating a little bit, showering, and changing clothes for once, he did so. In the back of his mind, he knew he better not drive because he almost wrecked last time because his mind went every which way. Ian took the bus from the apartmens down to the Speak Easy so he could have fun. Once he saw how many people there were, he went into the alley and had himself another line before strolling into the place. His concence was telling him not to go, but he didn't listen. This time, the drugs were hitting him harder than before; he felt dizzier than ever, so he took a seat at the bar once in. To him, it felt as if he didn't have a mind at all; he was beyond thinking about the world around him.

Staring off into space, he could feel the music, but not hear it. His blinking was slow and so was his breathing; something wasn't exactly right. Then he felt a tap on his shoulder and it was like nothing was happening; like he was completely sober and nothing was wrong, until he turned around. Ian couldn't believe his eyes and he refused to. Without even a wince, he had a single tear roll down his face. "Nova...?" He hurt more now than ever before. Mainly from the drugs, but from seeing her, and having her see him like this. "Wh.. What are you doing here? You l..ook good. Want me to buy you a drink?" Nothing else would come out other than his pathetic attempt to get her to think he was okay, even though he clearly wasn't.

tag: Nova
words:625
outfit: here
notes: shit post.

[Nova Lee Artuvan]

Nova had no idea what was going on with Kyler and Ian but she didn't like it one bit, both of them needed to eat a sandwich and take a nap. She couldn't bare seeing Ian suffer like this, and she couldn't help but think that maybe that it was her fault that he was acting out like this, maybe if she had returned more of his phone calls or texts he might have been okay right now. He wasn't a bad guy, he just had a few issues to work out. Maybe she shouldn't have been so hard on him.

"I-Ian..." She said as her face fell as she saw that he was about to cry. There was no doubt in her mind that he wasn't high. His pupils were huge and he was acting way to strange and out of it. She gently touched his cheek and wiped the tear away from his face. "Please don't cry honey..." She told him as she sat on the bar stool next to him. "Um, I work here now...you know, I dance..." She reminded him. "I don't drink at my shows, sorry." She declined his offer for the drink politely. She wasn't sure what to say now, this was all so awkward. But she reached for his hand, taking it in hers and rubbing it letting him know that she wasn't upset with him. She was probably about to give in and throw all those other thoughts out the window because she realized that the love of her life and her best friends needed some serious help and moral support. And she had made a promise to him a long time ago that she would always be there for him no matter what.

"B-Babe, Are you okay? What's going on with you?" She asked in a concerned tone, being very patient with him just like she used to be when he'd show up at her house high and confused. She really just wanted to take him to her apartment and take care of him right now but she couldn't afford to miss her first night at work. So she would try her best to get Ian to stay tonight until she was off so she could take him home with her, hopefully. "You should stay tonight...watch me dance and all? I always do better when you're in the crowd." she said as she bit her lip. But it was true she always danced better when he was there to watch her because she felt like no one else was watching, and it was just him and her.

[Ian Nathaniel Williams]

There was no doubt that Ian's subconcense knew the pain he was causing Nova at the time, but he didn't. It wasn't necesarially her fault that he had these problems; he just wouldn't deal with emotions like a normal person would. Ian was physically and mentally strong, emotionally, not so much. He could only hide his problems for so long and when he couldn't hide them anymore, he escaped. Maybe he shouldn't of been so clingy towards her. Maybe he should of tried to be a better person for her. Now he was going to do whatever needed to get her back in his life.

When she touched his face, Ian just closed his eyes and sighed. It was like all the pressure had been taken off of him. "I'm n..not crying. I haven't cried in.. years..." Once he opened his eyes again, he gave a small, forced smile remembering the fun he had watching her dance. "I'm glad you have a job. And.. and that's fin..e. I just forgot." Was that a lie he just told? He couldn't decifer it. He tightened his grip on her hand and looked down at them, reality hitting him; Nova was there and cared. "I may drink for you then. If I can ever remember what my favorite drink is.." For the life of him, he couldn't recall the name of it, but he could remember the taste, and how Nova's name tasted when it rolled from his lips.

When he heard her question, he just nodded slowly. "Yeah, just a little high is allllll." Ian Nathaniel Williams, don't lie to that poor girl. "Nahh... I just haven't liked myself lately.. Been missing some people..." It then hit him; he couldn't let Sasha anywhere near him in this state. He had no other choice but to clean himself up for Nova and Sasha. "Ye..ah, I'll watch you dance. I miss watching you.." He actually loved it; he loved everything about the girl and hated himself. "Wh..when do you go on baby? I'll be straight in the.. front to watch you. Can I do that? Or would you like me back here..?" Just then he squeezed her hand some, he didn't want her to go, but he knew she had to for the show.

"Oh, do you want a uhm.." he took a minute to think about what her usual drink was before a show. "A red bull? I could use one, I'm kinda tired but I want to have enough energy to stay up with you tonight." He went ahead and ordered the both of them a drink; if Nova didn't drink hers, he would drink it for her. Once he had them, he paid for them, and started chugging his down. This probably was a horrible thing for him to have; he was dehydrated and he could feel it, he just didn't want to tell her. "Hey.. Good luck on your show tonight. You'll do amazing like always. And remember I lo.." He stopped himself because he realized what he was about to say and it pained him because he didn't know if she'd want to hear it. "I love you Nov."

tag: Nova
words: 534
outfit: here
notes: ---

[Nova Lee Artuvan]

Her stomach turned as he admitted that he was high, and she knew he didn't mean on weed either, she hadn't seen him like this in years, and he was talking so weird, she really had to pay attention to make out what he was saying. This was not normal for him, and she was incredibly worried, she just wanted to break down and beg him to stop and to come back to her because she would help him, but she had to be strong. She had to be strong for the both of them if she was going to help him through this.

"I believe your favorite was...sex on the beach.." She told him as she remembering him ordering it all the other times he would come and watch her dance. She pressed her lips together and continued to keep her eyes on him and trying not to cry, she didn't have time to go fix her make up if she did. "High...Right.." She said with a nod then looking at her colorful fluffies that were on her feet. But she looked back up at him when he mentioned missing people, What did that even mean? Did he miss her? Maybe she was right, It might have been all her fault. Her stomach was twisting in knots again as the negative thoughts raced through her head.

"I go on in about fifteen minuets..." She said with a frown and then looked down at their hands. "Would you go up to the front please? I wanna be able to see you're pretty face." She said as she stroked his cheek again. she smiled as he remembered that she usually drank red bulls before she went on stage. "Yes, thank you." She said with a half smile, trying to act like nothing was wrong. "yeah, Stay up with me...Um you should come over tonight, please? You know Tara won't mind, and I'll even make you breakfast in the morning." She said with a slight grin hoping that he'd say yes. She then quickly drank her red bull he bought her because she was running out of free time.

"Thank you baby..."She said as she grabbed his face and kissed his face. "I love you too sweetheart, I really do." She said as she looked him straight into his eyes. "Don't leave, Okay? I'm kidnapping you." She said with a little giggle. "Okay baby I gotta go, I'll see you after the show." She said as she gave him another kiss, while her boss had shouted at her to get on stage. "Coming, I'm coming!" she said as she ran back stage, then when she heard the intro of Skrillex-Cinema she knew that was her cue. She usually picked this song to dance to first because it was the first song she ever danced to for Ian and it was their song.

[santa claus]

A loud belch erupted from
deep within Santa's throat
He hadn't really noticed
that he had a tear in his coat
His hat was tilted sideways
and still he had not a care
It didn't even bother him
that people were beginning to stare
The world seemed to sway with him
as he staggered down the strip
Santa wasn't sure how it got there
but there was a cut on his lip
He'd made an obscene gesture
to a particularly rude passerby
What was he supposed to be doing again?
Oh how time did fly

Christmas had come alot sooner
than he'd expected this year
But the grouchy old man was far
too tired to spread any cheer
Santa's eyes were glossed over
His beard was unkempt
As he stumbled into the bar
the patrons eyed him with contempt
The music blared too loudly
The lights were far too bright
Leaving Santa to seriously consider
Just calling it a night


When seated on a barstool
an amorous couple he did see
Could it at all be possible
that this was where he was meant to be?
Something seemed amiss but what
he couldn't know
Now could he be too bothered to
inquire as to their tale of woe
He held within his pocket a
simple candy cane
And he'd be damned if he
had traveled all this way in vain
As he approached the duo
his voice it did Croak
"Ho, Ho, Ho" he spoke


A harsh cough did follow
as he reached into his coat
To the boy he presented the candy cane
attached with a note

I love you baby, let's go pick out a Christmas tree, ya? Nova

With his task accomplished
He slumped down on the stool
His head resting on the bar
sleeping in a pool of drool

[Ian Nathaniel Williams]

Ian smirked when he heard the name of it; sex on the beach was kind of one of his fantansies that he was probably never going to get around to. "Oh yeah, I used to tie the cherry stem with my tongue." He just nodded when she repeated high. It took almost of everything he didn't have to tell her what he was high off of. The guilt in the back of his mind came back and hit him once again. Coming close to crying again, he shut his eyes, but only for a second. He didn't want for her to cry or anything else; he had to be strong now, even though he was no where near strong on his own. Before he said anything else, he called the bartender over and order himself one.

"Yeah baby, I'll go up front, right in the center like always." Finally, he was partially coming down, he hadn't had enough to keep him high long enough. His head was hurting, but he wasn't going to let that stop him from staying. "You're welcome.. Yeah, I'll come over. I kinda miss coming over..." Kind of? More like insanely missed it, like his other half was missing. And she was. "I'll come over anytime you want. But, I don't have my car tonight, I took the bus over here. I didn't want to drive high..." He sighed when he noticed her becoming ancy, all he wanted to do was spend time with her.

Kissing her back, he smiled bigger than he had in a long while. Actually, it was his first smile in countless weeks. He hadn't smiled since the last time Nova had made him smile. "I won't leave without you." He squeezed her hand once again before he let go. "Do your best beautiful; meet me back her after you're done." Kissing her again, he felt the slightest bit of himself once again. When he heard their song; he smiled even more and realized what he could of been losing if he lost her. "I love you!" he yelled as loud as he could just to reasure them both that he still did, no matter what.

Before he headed up to the front of the stage, he noticed Santa coming his way. Was this a trick on his own mind? No, it couldn't of been. When he reached up for the candycane and read the note, his heart warmed with a familiar sense of love. "Yeah, let's.." he mumbled to himself. He would have to tell her the first chance they could, they had to go get one. It would be their first official Christmas together. Pushing through the crowd, he began mouthing the words to the song. "You are my cinema, a Hollywood treasure. Love you just the way you are." He mouthed the words to her as he smiled while she danced; sipping on his drink.

tag: kam
words: 489
outfit: here!
notes: ---